"Successful Aging" in the United States and Mexico
Oct 2022
The Ramifications of Individualism
Sarai Steinberg
My Abuelita Lupita tells me she wants to die in Mexico. Yes, she was born there, but her reasons go deeper than a longing to return from dust to dust in her tierra natal (homeland). For one, according to her, Mexico is more affordable. Secondly, it centers caretaking and respect for elders, and finally, she whispers, it gives her a certain sense of peace. Compare this with America, where older adults are often invisible, and the pressures of productivity seldom cease, and I can begin to see her point. Aging in America is layered with complex expectations, some of which are broken down in the 2019 General Anthropology journal article “Interrogating Healthy/Successful Aging: An Anthropologist’s Lens.” Written by Brandeis Professor Sarah Lamb, the article explores how the United States’ structure and values inform Americans’ limited view on successful aging and employs a brief counterexample from India to encourage “cross-cultural insight” (Lamb 9). In a similar vein, my argument will explore how America’s individualistic nature and emphasis on full functionality — at every age — leads to a toxic view on successful aging. Contrastingly, countries like Mexico take a more holistic, relationship-based approach in considering a worthy seniority.
America is an ageist society that ties health and functionality to worth, requiring intense individual commitments that lead to a narrow view of successful aging. Americans are uncomfortable with aging and the “frailty, (inter)dependence, vulnerability, and transience” that comes with it (Lamb 7). This disquiet is exemplified anecdotally by everyday language, where we are told never to ask a woman her age, jab at individuals by calling them “old farts,” and live in a corporate culture that perpetually hypes up “young blood.” Given Americans’ discomfort with aging, the standard has become to overcorrect the natural forces of decay with successful aging. The key idea is that “we each have a personal responsibility to stay fit, healthy, active and independent as we age” (Lamb 7). Leading such a life often puts being functional over being fulfilled and requires significant financial resources, free time, and cognitive ability. The privilege — and sociopolitical forces — influencing the successful aging movement are not lost on Lamb. She references the widely held notion that the healthier older adults are, the less likely they are to burden the healthcare system (Lamb 7). In this way, successful aging reinforces the idea that individuals are worth what they produce, and if they are to take up oxygen in this nation, they should do so as contributors as opposed to beneficiaries.
On a more personal level, aging “the correct way” has also become a point of pride, coupled with judgment, for those who feel they’ve tackled it. Successful aging can be taken to an extreme, as Lamb indicated with her example of “Edna Feldman, who at 84 has difficulty walking but disciplines herself to go to a water aerobics class three times per week” (Lamb 8). Feldman noted, “I do think you have only yourself to blame if you don’t use whatever body you have left, to upkeep it” (Lamb 8). Seniors like Edna, who are dedicated to keeping their bodies strong and, one could infer, find purpose in doing so, are pretty admirable. At the same time, Edna’s particular case also highlights the intense judgment that comes with aging. Such judgment is exemplified even further by the “bio-moral [autopsies],” an idea coined by Barbra Ehrenreich, that Americans now subject one another to, where death is trailed by questions like “Did she smoke? Drink excessively? Eat too much fat and not enough fiber? Can she, in other words, be blamed for her own death” (Ehrenreich 93). Approaching aging, and death, from a solely health-based perspective neglects other essential aspects of an individual’s identity like their social life or spiritual affiliation or even their greatest failures and triumphs. In this way, successful aging — the very framework that aims to instill value “even” in the later stages of life — creates a high-standard success/failure binary that inhibits holistic enrichment.
On the contrary, for many elder Mexicans, successful aging is considered within the larger context of a person’s life, taking into account their relationships, spirituality, and accomplishments. This idea was explored by Ana Cecilia Reyes Uribe’s 2015 study, “Perceptions of successful aging among Mexican older adults,” published in the Journal of Behavior, Health & Social Issues. Her results listed the “key aspects mentioned by participants to define successful aging” (Uribe 12). Tied for first place were “remaining in good health” and “being able to cope with changes,” while “having family and friends who are there for me” took second (Uribe 12). Such emphasis on emotional well-being and a mindset of “accept and adapt” (Uribe 13) is distinct from the American view. Equally connected to successful aging in Mexico was the theme of “relatedness” (Uribe 13), where many seniors were able to recognize and accept their need for support. One participant mentioned that “you can age well when you know that you are loved and cared…I can always count on my wife and children; they are there for me whenever…And you know, at this age, things happen and you need support, you cannot do it all by yourself, you cannot” (Uribe 14). This verbalization of one’s own limitations is quite powerful and sheds light on, contrastingly, just how ingrained self-reliance is in America.
In Mexico, successful aging is tied to the people you know, be it the child who takes care of you, your church’s pastor, or the clerk who helps run your family’s convenience store. While the Mexican link between successful aging and community can undoubtedly place heavy burdens on (family-member) caretakers, it still highlights a more collectivist responsibility for honoring and supporting elders, allowing them to be celebrated instead of pigeonholed. I’d also like to note my purposeful use of the word “elder” here to mark the linguistic distinction between these international models of successful aging. While the rigidity of the word “senior” feels apt in America — where the definition of aging is quantified (65+), medicalized, and tied to the government — adopting “elder” in reference to Mexican older adults connotes their honored status as community leaders.
Branching from external connections to internal ones, for many Mexicans, successful aging was also tied to the theme of “spirituality and/or religion” (Uribe 14). Uribe’s participant testimonials indicated that the presence of God was a comforting force for certain elders, helping them mitigate loneliness and uncertainty (Uribe 14). For some, religion provides a framework to look beyond themselves constructively, creating a more integrated seniority. Finally, to age successfully, many Mexicans noted the importance of “achievement of goals” from their past through their present and future (Uribe 14). While achieving financial security and feeling accomplished as a parent were widely referenced feats, so were living each day to the fullest and keeping busy (Uribe 15). Overall, the Mexican approach to successful aging branched out to consider a person’s whole being.
Even with Mexican elders’ holistic approach, particular struggles of successful aging remain constant regardless of region. Most specifically, people tend to struggle with their deteriorating health and the insecurities attached to it. One 80-year-old female participant who is hard of hearing and has limited mobility shared how her situation depresses her, confiding, “I am alive, but it is not how I would like to spend the rest of my life,” adding, “I am a burden to my family. I know because I experienced the same with my mother…when she got worse she was not able to take a bath by herself” (Uribe 13). Having a more collective caretaking experience does not negate the dehumanizing aspects of aging, where an older adult’s needs become child-like. Feeling like a burden and losing one’s functionality are both perceptual and physical barriers that each elder must accept to find peace in their aging process — no easy feat. Another participant, though one who didn’t have the same experience going from a caregiver to a person in need of caregiving, exemplified how making peace with one’s declining health can lead to greater satisfaction. He noted: “Yes, sooner or later your health deteriorates, and then you need to accept that. I am able to move forward with ease because I try not to be under stress for the things I can no longer do. I better think about all what I can do and enjoy for as long as I can” (Uribe 13). Both of these snippets hone in on the metacognitive struggles of successful aging, where a region’s culture can influence one’s approach, but only up to a limit. The rest is up to the individual’s circumstances and attitude.
Granted, the impact of perceptions of successful aging in Mexico and America also stretch beyond older adults into the gendered reality of familial caregiving. In both nations, this often unpaid role is predominantly filled by women and riddled with physical, psychological, and opportunity costs. As more people turn to age in place alongside family for cultural or economic reasons, the concept of successful aging will need to turn outward to account for individuals (like caregivers) that are aging-adjacent, in order to create a sustainable framework for all.
I think my Abuelita Lupita got it wrong. It’s not death in Mexico that appeals to her; rather, it’s life. Successful aging in America is tied to avoidance of death through health-related measures that treat aging like a disease that needs to — and can be — healed. In contrast, in Mexico, individuals look at aging as one stretch of a longer path, allowing greater inner peace. That said, while Mexican elders undoubtedly have a more balanced view of aging, it would be remiss to use the nation as a total model without considering the influence of structural problems like gender inequality and poverty on their successful aging framework. Even with this, the honor reflected towards Mexican seniors in their final decades and beyond (ponder Dia de Los Muertos) invites a consideration of a better kind of aging. Specifically, where we don’t combat an inevitable loss of ability with health-related overcompensation, but instead, take the time to explore our life as a whole. So, to my Abuelita and all seniors struggling with similar questions, I encourage you to begin the slow crawl towards accepting your age, throw out the notion of “successful” in aging, and take stock of your lifelong values that make up the richness of you. And, if all else fails, you can always pack up your bags and move to Mexico.
Works Cited
Ehrenreich, Barbara. Natural Causes: An Epidemic of Wellness, the Certainty of Dying, and Killing Ourselves to Live Longer. Hachette, 2018.
Lamb, Sarah. “Interrogating Healthy/Successful Aging: An Anthropologist’s Lens.” General Anthropology, vol. 26, no. 2, 2019, pp. 1–9.
Uribe, Ana Cecilia Reyes. “Perceptions of successful aging among Mexican older adults.” Journal of Behavior, Health & Social Issues, vol. 7, no. 2, 2015, pp. 9–17.
Sarai Steinberg is from Mountain View, CA and studies in the College of Arts & Sciences at Washington University in St. Louis.